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1. A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father, "Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do as I please?" The father answered immediately, "I don't know. Nobody has lived that long [?]."
2. A teacher is talking to children about the importance of curiosity. Teacher: "Where would we be today if no one had ever been curious?"
Child: "In the Garden of [?] ?"
pomůcka: curiosity = zvědavost
3. Which hand do you clean your bum with, your left hand or your right hand? My left hand. I use toilet [?].
pomůcka: bum = zadek
4. Mummy, can I wear a bra now that I'm sixteen? No, [?] .
pomůcka: bra = podprsenka
5. Cannibal: Mummy, I don't like my little sister. Mother cannibal: Well, leave her on the side of your [?].
pomůcka: like = a) mít rád b) chutnat
6. A fish walks into a bar and the bartender says: "What do you want?" The fish croaks "[?]".
pomůcka: to croak = skřehotat
7. I've lost my dog! You should put an advertisement in the newspaper. That's crazy! He can't [?].
pomůcka: advertisement = inzerát
8. A man picks up a young woman in a bar and take her to his hotel. When they are relaxing afterwards, he asks " Am I the first man you ever made love to ?" She looks at him thoughtfully for a second before replying. " You might be," she says. "Your face looks [?] ".
pomůcka: to pick up = "sbalit"
9. A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found", the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear"? With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's [?] !"
pomůcka: leaf = list
10. Why does Prince Charles wear a red, white and blue belt made of English leather? To keep his trousers [?] .
pomůcka: belt = pásek
11. If you throw a white sheep into the Black Sea, what does it become ? " [?] "
pomůcka: to throw = hodit
12. Why does a blonde smile when there is lightening? She thinks she is getting her picture [?] .
pomůcka: lightning = blesk
13. Doctor, doctor, my little boy's swallowed a bullet. What shall I do? Well, for a start, don't point him at [?] .
pomůcka: to swallow = spolknout
14. Two blondes in a parking lot are trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger:
Blonde #1: "I can't seem to get this door unlocked!" Blonde #2: "Well, you'd better hurry up and try harder, it's starting to rain and the top is [?] ."
pomůcka: coat hanger = věšák na šaty
15. How do you sink a submarine full of blondes? Knock on the [?] .
pomůcka: to sink = potopit
16. Four out of five people think the fifth is an [?] .
17. A college professor asked his class a question. If Philadelphia is 100 miles from New York and Chicago is 1000 miles from Philadelphia and Los Angeles is 2000 miles from Chicago, how old am I. One student in the back of the class raised his hand and said "You are 44, professor " The Professor said "you're absolutely correct, but tell me how did you find the answer so quickly?" The student said. "You see, professor, I have a brother, he's 22 and he's half [?] ."
18. What's the difference between a strawberry and an elephant? One is red and one is [?] .
19. Doctor, doctor, I've just swallowed a sheep! Well, how do you feel? .
pomůcka: to swallow = spolknout
20. Famous last words: Don't worry, I know this bridge is [?] .
pomůcka: bridge = most